Last year, I had my most successful year ever professionally. Clients came, jobs piled up, money poured in, and I found myself looking for people to hire.
But a curious thing happened as my professional star rose: my personal happiness plummeted. At first, I couldn’t figure out why. I had left corporate life seven years ago and started my own brand strategy business. I guess you could call it a success, since I was able to keep it alive for seven years, and during that time had maintained a steady stream of business from several Fortune 50 firms.
But after so many years, I had grown tired and bored. I was every bit as disgruntled as I had been when I was an employee.
I felt threatened by undone tasks all day and all night; I couldn’t see friends or do anything I enjoyed. And I wasn’t pursuing anything creative. The things I used to enjoy – getting away to the nearby beach or walking my precious dogs – became chores.
Breaking out on your own seems very liberating, and in the beginning, it is. But it can also be very isolating. Indeed, I had become isolated in my own space. I never got away from the computer, and spent entire days wrestling projects to the ground and barking at clients over email. It felt like I was on the same hamster wheel I hated about the enterprise. I had become my own overlord.
I’d long ago been given a copy of Stefan Sagmeister’s diary of his Year Without Clients (no link online, sorry), and I longed to do something similar. So at the end of the year, I stopped everything, closed up shop and bolted to Big Sur. If you’re not a designer or you don’t know Stefan Sagmeister, you will really enjoy learning about him. Start with this video or this essay.
I didn’t have a year to spare, so I tried it for two weeks. And during that week, I made myself my sole project. I carried around a piece of paper for jotting ideas, and a list of what needed to change. After the usual two days it takes to unwind, I started to get happy again. I started to laugh. I started to exercise. I started to see movies. I went out to dinner. I talked to strangers. I sidewalk shopped. I discovered new places. And … just like that … I started to get big ideas. The paper I carried around wasn’t enough; I was filling up bar napkins by the handful with ideas as they sprouted.
It’s so obvious now, but I was burned out. Way out. My little creative spark? It had turned into a towering inferno. This is a fantastic article about burnout by Scott Boms if you suspect your little flame has taken on a life of its own.
And here’s why I was burned out: everything in life is about connections, and we humans are SOCIAL beings. When you strip yourself of all connection (read: spend your days interacting with a computer screen), you can’t possibly be happy. No matter how much money you make, or how big the clients you’re serving.
At about the same time, I heard about the Income Plateau: a Princeton study that found that everything you make over $75,000 doesn’t matter. Once you’ve met the basic needs on Maslow’s hierarchy, no amount of money will make you happier.
Which has an interesting implication for CEOs. They’re taking on more responsibility, more stress, more direct reports than the rest of us – and in exchange, all they’re doing is depleting their own happiness reserves.
(This is worth keeping in mind next time you’re consulting to a CEO …. He’s probably not having much fun. Your job is to provide some.)
The other reason I was burned out? I need to keep learning. Do something different. No matter what I do, I will adapt to it, and grow tired of it. So I must constantly seek new challenges and push myself to evolve.
At the end of the two weeks away, I had made a careful list of 7 promises I would make to myself in 2011:
- No more than 3 big projects at a time.
- Money doesn’t matter.
- Remember #2 when you are fighting against #1.
- Take a MANDATORY week off every quarter.
- Take a MANDATORY hour off every day.
- Find a pro bono project with meaning. Commit to it.
- Go to more meetings with friends and colleagues (not just clients).
I’m still working on #1 and #3. But one of the things I did for #5 was to hire a trainer to come to my door at a certain time and pluck me from my surroundings. After a couple of phone conversations, he told me he didn’t want to work out with me in the mornings; he wanted to come in the middle of my day to break up my routine.
So now we work out twice a week at 11 AM, and we do it at the beach. He makes me squat and lunge while facing the water, basically forcing me to take notice of the beautiful natural scenery in which I live.
I’m a work in progress, but last year will never happen to me again. I’ve learned that to preserve my own creativity, I have to unleash it on my own behalf.